things you must do

do not reward ignorance

when confronted with a negative situation, react in a positive way.

listen to new music

keep contact with old friends

enlighten yourself in science and life

learn to drive a vehicle other than a car

do not die.

eat spicy food

get inked and pierced

learn to play an insturment. do not smash

shave head or get a mohawk

write a long story

assemble a collection

visit a forigen land

learn a new language

study a major religion and prove god does not exsist

sleep during the day

wake during the night

see a musical preformance

finally

fall in love

i am the one.

you will frustrate

will frustrate you

make you laugh

wil make you smile

will make you get up and turn off the light

that will let you control the tv..forever

make you smile

hopfully never make you cry

will hold you close, and keep you warm

you look to for comfort

who will cry when you are not near

who will be there when you need it the most.

yeah.. i dont know.

i don't know.. i know tho, this is one of thoes points in my life where i freak out and i wish that it would end.

but theres just some things that i have to take care of.
really its not that huge but.. it could be huge.
it just freaks me out entirly

why do things like this bother me so..

so im sitting here staring into this screen blankly.. with my hands and my boding freezing wondering...
why?
why do i look this way..
why do i feel this way
and why does life treat me this way.

i cant stand but wish it would end. but i cant

to end is to make others suffer.

the cowards way out. is not mine.

i look at my hands and my face.. and wonder why do i freeze so?

i stop and cant help and think why.

the coward.. or the loved one.

right now i am not sure.

life is just a mess. at moments.

in the end its all worth it.

but

eventually it does end.

somone...

Friday, January 06, 2006

i was just thinking about someone..

that i love..

i really care about, and when i cant do anything to help them, i feel horrible...

id do most anything for them. well killing... unless i get help and i wont get arrested for it ill do it.
homie dont play the butt game..

i dont know.. if you say im whipped then whatever im whipped, i just do what she says, i dont mind it i love her

i know its slightly odd to say that when im only 18 but wwhhhhaatever..she makes me happy and most the time shes happy unles shes dealing with some bullshit form some bitch ass faced people.. haha

i could be in the worst mood possible and i could hear her voice and see her face and id feel prefectly ok again.. thats how great she is in my opinoin.

me and her could be doing absolutly nothing and id be happy, she could be snoring loud enought for the neighbors to hear.. i wouldnt care.. i might laugh a bit but still i love her.

she could do the most disgusting thing.. im like HA HA you made a wierd noise.. i dont care.. unless the smell makes the wallpaper chip and peel off..

absolute best thing in the world .. laying in bed.. each other arm in arm.. its close to heaven..

i dont know what else to say.. besides.. i need to sleep because it is 3.35am